Going to the Student Union as a graduate

As a student there was nothing better than a night out at the union. With endless amounts of cheap booze, cheesy tunes and great friends the student union became like a second home. It was at the student union where you created your best memories and the gossip shared the morning after the night before was never to be missed (unless you were lying in the foetal position next to the toilet too hungover to move.)

However, going to the student union as a graduate is a different story. Once you’ve realised you are no longer a student and never will be again, going to the union is an odd experience and completely different to your student days. You feel old, you don't know anybody anymore and all you really want is your bed. 

A night out at the student union as a graduate can go a little bit like this...

Pre drinks

Student: Oh no I’ve finished my bottle of wine. Time to crack open the Vodka!

Graduate: I’m just sticking to wine tonight I don’t want to mix my drinks.

Student: DOWN IT! DOWN IT! GET IT DOWN YOU ZULU WARRIOR!

Graduate: I definitely can’t down my drink otherwise I'll be sick and won't make it out.

Student: I’ve just vommed everywhere, what time are we leaving?

12:00am – Arrival at the club

Student: Oh my god, look it’s John from history! Oh and there’s Sarah from tennis! And look, it’s that guy we met here last week, let’s go and say hi!

Graduate: I don’t know anybody here.

Student: I am so drunk, I just got with this guy, he was a fresher but he was fit!

Graduate: I am being approached by 18 year olds. Step away, STEP AWAY!!

2am

Student: SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS!! SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS!!

Graduate: Hi, I’d like a glass of water please.

Student 1: Oh man, Ive just been sick on the dancefloor, I hope the bouncer didn’t see. Shall I go home?

Student 2: Urm no, its SAMBUCCA time!!

Graduate: I can’t believe someone has just been sick on the dance floor, I think its time she went home.

3am

Student: I can’t believe tonight’s over already. After party everybody?! 

Graduate: I can’t believe tonight is only just over, I think its time for bed.

4am

Student: Oh my god, this is the best goddamn pizza I have ever had in my whole entire life.

Graduate: I am not touching any pizza that costs 2 pounds, there is clearly something wrong with it for it to be so cheap.

The next morning

Student: I am never drinking again…until tonight!

Graduate: I am never drinking again. Ever.

9 Signs you're not over university

The transition from a lazy, drunken and dirty student to a sensible, mature and socially acceptable adult is tough, and for some, impossible. After three years of student living, the ability to adapt to a new way of life is a skill that we all develop at different rates (but one that we unfortunately cannot put onto our CV’s.)

Whilst many people are now settling into their graduate lives, there are others out there still struggling to come to terms with the fact that university is over and it is time to move on.

I sympathise with you graduates, but if we carry on living in denial then we will forever be stuck in our student ways and we will never get over university…

1. Going out on weekdays

Despite being the oldest person in the club, you’re still out partying and downing jager bombs with the students whilst dancing to the cheesiest tunes possible. The only difference is, you have to be at work at 8am and turning up wearing sunglasses whilst stinking of booze is never a good look.

2. Eating cheap food

Your cupboards are still stacked high with 10p packets of super noodles, your fridge is filled with value microwave meals and you still order 24 inch pizzas for five pounds from a random pizza take out despite having enough money for Dominoes or Pizza Hut. Oh, and Sainsbury’s Vodka and Tesco Coke is still your thing.

3. Stewing in your own filth

You’re proud of your infamous ‘floordrobe’, the mould on the walls becomes part of the room décor, the hoover is there for show and your room becomes so inundated with plates, cups, cutlery and leftover food that you could start your own restaurant. 

4. Bedtime. What bedtime?

                                             via blisstree.com

You still haven’t mastered the art of an early night despite having to be up at 7am. Going to sleep before 1 is an early night and waking  up at 11 on weekends is still considered as an early morning.

    

                                        Via jokideo.com

5. Pyjamas are your only clothes

You come home from work and you are straight into your pyjamas. You spend the whole weekend in your pyjamas. In fact, sometimes you even go to the shops in your pyjamas. They’re comfortable, cheap and most importantly of all, you don’t have to wash them as regularly as normal clothes.

6. Drinking games

 

You are invited to your friends for some civilised drinks, but you are first off with the ring of fire cards, you initiate the beer pong teams and you spend a lot of time in the kitchen making concoctions for dirty pints. Sophisticated cocktails and dinner parties are not part of your repertoire.

                                     Via entertainment.ie

7. Trashy TV

Jeremy Kyle, Jerry Springer and Maury are recorded on series link and you watch these whilst sat in your pyjamas eating your beef super noodles and drinking Sainsburys Vodka and Tesco Coke.

8. Stealing condiments

                                              Via Wikipedi

 Stealing salt, pepper and sugar is still a regular thing despite the fact you  can actually afford to buy them and most of the time you already have them in your cupboards.

9. You still don’t own a Christmas tree

   Enough said.

Instagram vs. Reality

I am someone who is completely and utterly addicted to social media and Instagram is my absolute favourite. I love scrolling through my news-feed on a daily basis and viewing all the different photos that are shared (particularly ones of pugs, I am obsessed and it is a problem). With over 300 million users it is clear to see that Instagram is fast becoming one of the most popular forms of social media and it is no surprise as to why. As with Facebook and Twitter, Instagram provides us with a platform to create an ideal version of ourselves and as a result present an unrealistic portrait of who we really are. As I regularly witness on Instagram, we often present ourselves as one who regularly consumes a sophisticated lunch or two, enjoys a luxury holiday here and there and can master the perfect ‘selfie’ whilst wearing our Docie and Gabbana sunglasses and Chanel lipstick with effortless ease. The truth is, in reality, we would much rather be eating anything else but the posh lunch, we spent most of the annual ‘once a year’ holiday as red and raw as a lobster, and that perfect selfie? Well, after thirty three takes, five different filter effects and an hour later, we were finally ready to post it on Instagram.

I have found that going through other peoples Instagram photos can also have a detrimental effect on your own self esteem, particularly when you are bored out of your mind and having a down day. You see pictures of people travelling the world and riding elephants in Thailand and people going to lavish parties drinking the most expensive champagne whilst wearing the most beautiful dresses. As you view these different images you begin to ponder about your own life and sometimes a sense of misery appears. Whilst they’re out living their lives you are still in your pyjamas at 4pm watching copious amounts of repeats on Netflix and don’t plan on moving for the whole weekend. From personal experience you begin to feel useless and worthless, as if your life is boring. In reality however, you need to remember that what other people are posting is not daily life. For all you know the elephant in Thailand could have then taken a large poo on to the person’s foot and the people at the lavish parties then spent the next few hours after the photo was taken vomming into the nearest toilet or sink they could find.

Instagram does not represent a persons every day life, it shows the good bits, but not the rest. Instagram is not reality; every image is altered to make it look even better than it is, and instead of taking in the view for ourselves, we let the camera lens do it for us. I am guilty of this myself (see below), but next time, I am going to take a step back and view the image with my eyes and store it into my memory, not my Instagram account.

Instagram                                                                                         Reality

   

5 Things I Should Have Done at University.

Three years at university really do just whiz by. The endless studying, partying and general student living now seems like a distant memory as I enter my second year as a graduate. There is no doubt that university really was the best time of my life, however, sometimes I do look back and feel I could have made better use of my time there. Of course, the past cannot be changed and there is no point looking back with regrets and if I had the chance to go back and change things I wouldn’t. However, there are five things I believe that I probably should have done at university, and although it is no longer possible for me to do these, perhaps future students out there can learn from this. (Of course, not everybody will agree with these, as my boyfriend was happy to tell me!)

1. Join a society – Joining a society, especially in your first year, is a great way to make friends and gain confidence. This is something I really wish I did at university but I never got around to it. As most societies were sports related I felt I could not join any of them as my fitness levels are probably way below average as I can barely run for the bus without getting out of breath!  However, as I found out too late, most of the societies also had a ‘social members’ side to them. This meant I could have had the opportunity to take part in the infamous Wednesday night traditions but not have to suffer the pure embarrassment of playing the actual sport. So whether you play sports or not there is always a society out there for you, but if there is not, you can always create your own! 

2. Volunteer/get a job – One of the best things about doing an arts degree is that you really do have so much free time on your hands. As annoying as it was, having just 5 hours of uni a week is a blessing if you’re interested in extra curricular activities. Of course by third year I could have just ripped my brain out at the thought of having a part time job, (seriously where did people find the time?) but volunteering for a few hours a week would have been a great way to try new things, gain confidence and add something to the dreaded CV. There are so many volunteering opportunities that university can help you with and it is something I really should have taken advantage of.

3. Use the Career Service – As you enter your final year at university the phrases ‘real world’, ‘graduate schemes’ and ‘graduate jobs’ begin to be imprinted into your brain and hang over you like a dark cloud on a rainy day. With the constant worry of essays, exams and the daunting dissertation the last thing you really want to think about is jobs and what the hell it is you’re going to do next. With so much work to do, I found myself constantly avoiding the inevitable future and began to blank out the idea that there was life after university. After the joy and celebration of graduation real life begins to kick in and the constant fear of not knowing what you want to do and who to turn to becomes very real. However, that is what your university career service is there for, to help you find your way and provide as much as advice for you as they possibly can. Whether it is useful or not, there is no harm in visiting your career service to see what they come up with. I never used mine and as a result I will never know what advice they could have had to offer.

  
4.  Explore the city/culture – Just like most students I spent most of my time hunched over a book in the library or cooped up hung over in bed watching endless amounts of trashy television to help me get through a painful day. With so much studying and partying to do, it was very rare for students to be seen out of the confines of the university area. However, there is so much more to university than the university building itself and these three years may be your only chance to explore your new home. Whilst I spent my final weeks at university exploring the cities history, including its castle, cathedral and museums, there was so much more Leicester had to offer but it was too late for me to see. Explore your new city and thrive in the different cultures it has to offer.

     
5. Drink less – Yes, really. It goes without saying that students really do love to party, a lot. Drinking copious amounts of alcohol, waking up with vomit in our hair and arriving to lectures still drunk from the night before was something that occurred on a daily basis. However, students can drink dangerous amounts of alcohol and the next day sometimes you really do think, was it worth it? Drinking so much at uni has led to me finding alcohol really hard to stomach and even a casual beer results in flashbacks of some of the awful hangovers I used to suffer from. Drinking can be fun and it truly is part of the student lifestyle, but sometimes you really do need to know when to stop